Yankees owner Hank Steinbrenner, who recently spent $423 million for three players, told Freecheezeburgerz that it made sense to replace Joe Girardi with "the most inspirational leader of the last 50 years. He was expensive but we hope he's worth it. If not, I'll fire him."

The move comes one week after the singer Bono quit the rock group U2 in order to sing "Take me out to the ballgame" at every Yankees home game and two weeks after the TV chef Emeril agreed to cook hot dogs at the new Yankee Stadium.

Sports agent Scott Boras confirmed rumors that, with the help of Illinois Governor Rod Blagojevich, he helped steer Obama to the Yankees.

Boras said Obama's change of mind is no different than when the professional basketball player Carlos Boozer promised to sign with one team but then signed with another for significantly more money. Then he added with a smile that it's actually not as bad as what Manny Ramirez did to the Boston Red Sox last summer.

"He hasn't taken the oath of office yet, so he can change his mind," said Boras. "Look, we got a better deal from the Yankees than we did from the American people," he said. In addition, Boras last night negotiated an opt-out bail-out clause for Obama that made no sense yet he was able to get a confused Treasury Secretary Henry Paulson to agree to his terms and now the state of Hawaii is called "Boras".

Obama - a Chicago White Sox fan whose favorite sport is basketball - was vacationing in the Boras Islands and could not be reached for comment.

In one other related bit of Yankees news concerning the coaching staff, Boras confirmed he is representing Pope Benedict XVI and a deal may be announced any day.

Previous columns

Conspiracy Theories and such
    Scott Boras Will Get You A Multi-Year Deal!
    Lebron Declares NY Is A Suburb Of Cleveland!
    Pete The Plumber Is Pissed!
    Sarah Palin Is A Robot!
    Feds Bailout NY Yankees
    Media Elite Apologizes To GOP, Promises No More Questions
    NASCAR Will Borrow Rivalries From NFL
    Non-Voters Hold Their Own Convention
    Manny Ramirez Enters Every Olympic Event
    Brett Favre's Old Sofa Talks To Greta Van Susteren
    Lost Marbles In Two Acts
    Vet This! How to Pick a Running Mate
    NASCAR Crew Chief George W. Bush & Driver John Q. Public
    NFL Draft - Analyzing Reggie Clinton, Reggie McCain & Reggie Obama
    Goodbye Rocky Colavito's Curse
    Roger Clemens Versus Barry Bonds - Movie Pitches
    The Fake Tony Stewart "Goodyear-Is-My-Barber" Commercial
    The Amy Winehouse Obama Song For Pittsburgh Pirates Fans
    If The Presidential Candidates Entered The 2008 Daytona 500
    Theory #3, Milk-or-Whiskey Democracy
    Rules For Bad Bosses
    Will Vote For Money
    Bag O' Burgers #1
    Theory #2 - Fenway Park
    Theory #1 - Vick's Dogs
    Freecheezeburgerz - CURRENT COLUMN


Other Stuff
    What NASCAR Taught A Liberal About America - Election Day Column
    Please Don't Build The Cape Cod Wind Farm
    Lyrics
    Freecheezeburgerz - CURRENT COLUMN